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Turn Him On Tonight BY ALLISON GLOCK Secrets of Seduction From the Pros
It's his birthday or your anniversary, or the kids are at grandma's. You want it (that "it") to be really hot. Or maybe there's no special occasion. You're
just looking to crank things up a few notches, to make your satisfying but predictable sex life, well, less predictable and more
satisfying. But how? Where do you turn for advice? Who really knows how to make love interesting, fun, fresh? Sure, you can get information from sex therapists and their manuals. But such
advice tends toward the predictable — and sounds clinical. So we went to different kinds of experts — specialists in music, massage, lingerie, stripping — technical pros all, who know what really gets a guy
going. Here's their advice: easy, inexpensive, and naughty
How to Light His Fire
Don't wait until nighttime to get things going. Arouse your husband's interest with a seductive call to
his office in late afternoon. According to experienced 900-number workers, sexy talk requires a gentle, low voice. You also want to sound approachable as well as receptive to his desires. Try questions —
"Do you want to make love tonight? Wouldn't you love to do it in the shower?" — anything you believe your mate will find titillating. If you're too embarrassed to be explicit, be
flirty: "I want you to touch me like you did last night. I love it when you kiss me. I was thinking about you all day." Obviously you don't want to let the mundane into your conversation —
"Oh, and honey, could you pick up some cat food on the way home?" — but do keep talking, even if it's just "aaah," "yes." "Silence makes the listener uncomfortable and
spoils the mood," one operator explained.
How to Dress for Great Sex
Buying items that turn our husbands on without making us feel silly takes some effort. But it
shouldn't be an afternoon of torture (like swimsuit shopping). The idea, says Jonathan Celaya, a former sales clerk and lingerie consultant at Los Angeles' Pleasure Chest, a boudoir shop that counts many
Hollywood celebrities as regular clients, "is to have fun with it." To find out what your lover might like, leave a Victoria's Secret or Frederick's of Hollywood catalog around and see which
items hold your husband's gaze longest. Or choose what most men choose when shopping alone: a garter belt-lace bra combination in bright red or black, says Celaya. But since no woman feels
amorous wearing something that pinches or prohibits breathing, try garments on and experiment with styles and fabrics. "Many women really like a spandex-based material because it gently cinches you in
and holds you up," says Celaya. Salespeople also say you can never go wrong with a satin gown. It highlights curves, flows beautifully, and catches the light. Plus, the ambiguous combination of
vampiness and elegance is a real turn-on for men.
How to Cook Up Some Good Loving
The idea is to enjoy a tasty but light meal, so your lover will have more energy for the bedroom.
"You don't want him to be stuffed," says Cynthia Mervis Watson, M.D., a Santa Monica, California, physician and author of Love Potions: A Guide to Aphrodisiacs and Sexual Pleasure. That
means you should skip meats and heavy sauces, go easy on cheese and dessert, and load up instead on leafy vegetables, fruits, and spices. The more vegetables, the better, says Dr. Watson. Greens, fruits,
spices, and herbs all contain essential oils and vitamins that, she claims, stimulate hormone production and increase circulation. Damiana, available in health food stores, is rumored to be one of the most
arousing of herbs. But if a few nibbles of cabbage and a cup of chamomile tea will only make your husband cranky (and isn't your idea of a turn-on either), add a little indulgence to your meal.
Dip your strawberries in chocolate, or bake a light filet of salmon with vanilla sauce. Have a glass of wine. As for those foods traditionally thought to be aphrodisiacs — oysters, champagne — studies
suggest they raise testosterone (and libido) levels. And they feel so sexy and taste so inviting that nibbling on a few and sipping a bit just seem to set the mood.
How to Get a Romantic Glow
First, don't
buy pink bulbs, says Derryl Strong, a Knoxville, Tennessee, lighting expert, photographer, and consultant for Glamour Shots, a studio that specializes in boudoir settings. "The rose coloring actually makes you look pink." What you want, he says, is an amber tint, like you get at sunset; 60-watt amber bulbs in your bedside lamps give you that radiance. Or if your overhead fixture is hooked to a dimmer, put amber bulbs in it. "Dimmed light diffuses, so you avoid the unflattering ghoul-like look," explains Strong. If you must use white bulbs, make them low-wattage (no more than 30 watts) and let the light reflect off your bed by using white sheets or tossing a white throw over it. "A woman lying on white linens and lit overhead by a soft light looks great because the fabric reflects and fills in any harsh shadows," explains Strong.
Seducing Him With Scent
Pick a perfume that reflects the image you want to project that night, says Susan Virtue, creative director of the Givaudan-Roure fragrance house. If,
for example, you want to play the earthy girl-next-door, try a clean fragrance like Navy or the Body Shop's White Musk. Feeling vampy? Pick Obsession or another scent with a little spice. Want something in
between, like the girl-next-door with a run in her stocking? Look for creamy notes, from Nicole Miller or Natori. As for musk, let your mate take a sample whiff before you squirt it on for your anniversary,
advises Virtue. "It's a love or hate thing." Feeling really adventuresome? Pheromones — mammalian chemical triggers rumored (but never proved) to make men hot — are coming back.
Realm, a unisex fragrance, contains androgistone, a pheromone secreted by men and women that has been shown to "put pigs into an immediate mating stance," says Sarah Kemp, Ph.D., a sensory
psychology researcher. Or for a really novel twist, start baking. A study conducted by Alan Hirsch, M.D., neurologic director of the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation in Chicago, revealed
that one of the things that put men
into an immediate mating stance wasn't pheromones but buns — the kind with cinnamon on top. According to Dr. Hirsch, penile blood flow increased when his subjects sniffed cinnamon buns.
How to Smooth the Way
While massage possesses healing and therapeutic qualities, there's no denying its "natural eroticism," says Peter Flax, an Atlanta masseur who has toured with
Madonna. Have your husband take a hot shower beforehand, or crank up the heat in the bedroom (shivering kills the romance) and warm your oils in the microwave. Massage oils can be purchased at specialty
cosmetic shops (like H2O or the Body Shop). Create a soothing mood: Play unobtrusive music, turn down the lights, unplug the phone. Once you've set the scene, go slowly. Have your husband lie
on his stomach, and either kneel beside him or straddle him across his lower back. Start the massage just below his head, your palms positioned on the shoulders and fingers pointing toward the the spine.
Slide your hands down his back (you should have just enough oil to move smoothly over his skin, but not so much that he's dripping), leaning forward to add pressure. Most masseurs recommend looking for clues
— smiles, winces, moans — to know what feels good. If you must, ask; only then will you know if you should use less or more pressure. When you reach his waist, drag your hands across his body until they
hit the bed, then trail them up along his sides. At his underarms, turn your fingers in and repeat the stroke. Or, for variety, trace his spine with your thumbs, curving around each vertebra as you progress.
Above all, linger over his body and maintain contact with his skin. "If you're going to be in a hurry," says Flax, "pick another time."
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